I soooooooooooooo fucking swear
not to let this post become a rant about the fucking daily mail, but this was too good to miss....
"When Linda Green turns up at the maternity hospital, midwives treat her as one of the family. Which is hardly surprising, since she has had no fewer than 14 children of her own.
Mrs Green, 45, has spent ten-and-a-half years of her life pregnant.
The ages of her sons and daughters range from two to 25 - and she also has two grandchildren"
...and then...
England Shirts - Making Casual Racism Socially Acceptable
"Mrs Green and her husband Graham, an engineer, had daughter Kelly in 1980. Since then she has given birth to Stacey, 23, Gavin, 21, Melissa, 19, Kim, 17, Chantelle, 15, Ben, 14, Oliver, 12, Portia, 11, Macauley, ten, Preston, seven, Octavia, five, Blake, four, and Ellesse, two"
Oh, it gets better
"Here's a day in the life of Linda Green:
6.50am: Mrs Green gets up after less that five hours of sleep
7am: Wakes Chantelle, Ben, Oliver and Portia
7.30: Makes breakfast for the above four and plays with younger ones if they wake up
8am: Takes Macauley, Preston, Octavia and Blake to primary school breakfast club
8.30am: Gets Ellesse ready for nursery. Picks up Stacey and takes her to work. Takes grandchildren Jasmine and Mikail to nursery with Ellesse
9am: Cleans up breakfast things and tidies house
11am: Picks up toddlers from nursery
Midday: Makes lunch
1pm: Spends afternoon either at a toddlers' group or at home
3.05pm: Youngsters return from school
4.30pm: Prepares tea
5.30pm: Supervises children's homework
6pm: Starts putting younger children to bed
8pm: Bedtime for the older four
11pm: Starts chores
Midnight: Washing, ironing and laying out of school uniforms
2am: Goes to bed
FOR FUCKING FUCKS SAKE, IF YOU FUCKING STOPPED POPPING KIDS LIKE THEY WERE GOING OUT OF FUCKING FASHION THEN YOUR STUPID BENEFIT-CLAIMING, SLACK-MINGED, VICTORIAN-FASHIONED, MIMIC-OF-THAT-SKETCH-FROM-THE-MEANING-OF-LIFE, UGLY-CHAV-ASS MIGHT, AND I REPEAT - MIGHT, STAND A CHANCE OF GETTING MORE THAN FOUR-AND-A-HALF-HOURS SLEEP A NIGHT.
YOU ARE GOING TO DIE EARLY
YOUR HOUSE MUST FUCKING STINK OF BABY SHIT
WHEN DO YOU GET TIME TO FUCKING SHAG FOR CRYING OUT LOUD?
Other than that, badgers nadgers wish the family the best of luck with child 15, this one might be the next Peter Andre if you are lucky....
"When Linda Green turns up at the maternity hospital, midwives treat her as one of the family. Which is hardly surprising, since she has had no fewer than 14 children of her own.
Mrs Green, 45, has spent ten-and-a-half years of her life pregnant.
The ages of her sons and daughters range from two to 25 - and she also has two grandchildren"
...and then...
England Shirts - Making Casual Racism Socially Acceptable
"Mrs Green and her husband Graham, an engineer, had daughter Kelly in 1980. Since then she has given birth to Stacey, 23, Gavin, 21, Melissa, 19, Kim, 17, Chantelle, 15, Ben, 14, Oliver, 12, Portia, 11, Macauley, ten, Preston, seven, Octavia, five, Blake, four, and Ellesse, two"
Oh, it gets better
"Here's a day in the life of Linda Green:
6.50am: Mrs Green gets up after less that five hours of sleep
7am: Wakes Chantelle, Ben, Oliver and Portia
7.30: Makes breakfast for the above four and plays with younger ones if they wake up
8am: Takes Macauley, Preston, Octavia and Blake to primary school breakfast club
8.30am: Gets Ellesse ready for nursery. Picks up Stacey and takes her to work. Takes grandchildren Jasmine and Mikail to nursery with Ellesse
9am: Cleans up breakfast things and tidies house
11am: Picks up toddlers from nursery
Midday: Makes lunch
1pm: Spends afternoon either at a toddlers' group or at home
3.05pm: Youngsters return from school
4.30pm: Prepares tea
5.30pm: Supervises children's homework
6pm: Starts putting younger children to bed
8pm: Bedtime for the older four
11pm: Starts chores
Midnight: Washing, ironing and laying out of school uniforms
2am: Goes to bed
FOR FUCKING FUCKS SAKE, IF YOU FUCKING STOPPED POPPING KIDS LIKE THEY WERE GOING OUT OF FUCKING FASHION THEN YOUR STUPID BENEFIT-CLAIMING, SLACK-MINGED, VICTORIAN-FASHIONED, MIMIC-OF-THAT-SKETCH-FROM-THE-MEANING-OF-LIFE, UGLY-CHAV-ASS MIGHT, AND I REPEAT - MIGHT, STAND A CHANCE OF GETTING MORE THAN FOUR-AND-A-HALF-HOURS SLEEP A NIGHT.
YOU ARE GOING TO DIE EARLY
YOUR HOUSE MUST FUCKING STINK OF BABY SHIT
WHEN DO YOU GET TIME TO FUCKING SHAG FOR CRYING OUT LOUD?
Other than that, badgers nadgers wish the family the best of luck with child 15, this one might be the next Peter Andre if you are lucky....
posted by bobbyinternet at 6:33 pm
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